Etienne St. Clair: As Scrummy as a French Eclair (and perhaps just as tall…)

by Vee

For those of you who’ve been with us for some time, you may have noticed I’ve been MIA from YA Crush.  Then again, you may not have noticed at all, thanks to Tee’s awesomely, awesome writing prowess.  (Thanks for saving the day, MFEO.)

In any case, I’ve missed you and though things have been a bit hectic I still made some time to follow YA Crush’s advice — as the entire world should —- and read a few of Tee’s recommendations.

Anna and the French Kiss is the book you want to take with you if a) you’re going on a fun vaca and don’t want something too heavy to read (both figuratively and literally), b) you’re having a bad day and need something to help you escape, or c) you’re having a good day and want something to enhance that mood.

It’s light and airy, super fun, it’s sweet and delicious.  Opening this book is much like opening a pretty little box from zee patisserie filled with delightful morsels of puff pastries.  And the piéce de resistance in the book would be (drum roll please): St. Clair, the hottie that Anna has her eye on.  He’s so friggin’ adorable and sweet that, much like un éclair du chocolat, he’s liable to give you a cavity for which you’ll say “thank you” afterward and gladly go get a filling.

My one tiny complaint (no pun intended) is Monsieur Éclair St. Clair’s height.  What the?  Why???  It’s lousy enough that this happens in the real world — you know, you meet the perfect prom date but, alas, you can’t wear heels because he’d be setting his head on your shoulders during the “slow ones”.  This isn’t the real world, so can we please just make him the proper height for tucking-your-head-into-the-neckage-area action?

I suppose, as he is so adorable in every other way, the author needs to give him one flaw that isn’t insurmountable (ok, I can’t kid anyone, that pun was totally intended).  This made it tough for me though.  Every time I was immersed in his charm, laughing at his flawless sarcasm or swooning at the subtle ways in which he revealed his devotion to Anna (sigh), she’d mention the height issue and *poof* I would feel my swoon fizzle and dissolve like a flat glass du champagne.  (Now, don’t you worry about me, troops, he’s so scrummy it wasn’t hard to return to the swoonage.)

Thankfully, after much discussion, Tee and I came to the conclusion that, though she – being a taller girl than I – could truly not get past this, my fictional self (who will always exist as a young, naïve, teen girl) could totally have been his prom date because at 5’3 and ¾” there’s no way he’d be shorter than me.

With this crisis averted, I will safely add him to my fictional BF list.  Oh, thaz right, he is yummy-terrif enough to actually make it to my list.  He is not just adorable, he’s got just a little bit of a temper (a controllable one, which is juuuuust right), he’s smart, cultured and funny.  The thing that sent him over the edge and a certain shoe in for my list?  He has…wait for it…and English accent! (Not to be confused with a French or Italian accent, which do nothing for me.)  Now, not only does he have an English accent for me to imagine as I read through the pages but the author is kind enough to actually spell out the way he might pronounce things in his English yummy-talk once in a while.  This means my brain doesn’t even have to work that hard.  It’s a win-win all around.

I suppose one could say that in conclusion (if you need one) an éclair is just as delicious, even if it is a small one.  So long as it has an English accent.

12 thoughts on “Etienne St. Clair: As Scrummy as a French Eclair (and perhaps just as tall…)

  1. I really do love him (and eclairs, obvs.). It’s just that every time his height came up I would cringe. I was like yes, yes, yes, no, no, nooooooooooo! Stop with the shortness! It must be the Amazonian in me. I need tall guys. In order to reconcile St. Clair’s crushworthy hotness with my ridiculous height (because obvs. this matters in real life)I will officially pull a Vee and imagine him tall. Much better.

    • me too! i totally had to pretend he was tall. i have a good selective memory. why can’t he be just a few inches taller than anna? in my head, of course,he’s as tall as ron weasley (oh, hubba hubba).

      • Ron! I love that adorable ginger! Yes, tall is much hotter but for Vee it’s all relative because girlfriend is teensy.

      • Daphne, I have the best selective memory/will to change what it on paper…so much so that I’ve a) convinced myself Peeta it brunette, and b) decided Will from “Clockwork Angel” looks like a young Jude Law, merely due to the fact that I can easily imagine him in his “Sherlock Holmes” outfits and hear his voice with the accent as I read. My crazy is a little…well, crazy.

    • Oh Tee…I am so glad you can force the crazy to bend to your will. NOW do you understand how I morphed Peeta into a brunette???? 😉

      • Yay Daphne…team Peeta!!!! Whoo, hoo! Harry Potter is a different story…we met him when he was in the womb, practically. I will always picture that cute little face that was under the stairs…awwwww.

      • He’s cute in a “oh my goodness look how grown up you are” kind of way whereas Will and Gale and even Peeta are just plain hot. And St. Clair, of course.

      • Tee…get back in your Gale corner and leave Daphne and me alone to swoon over our brunette Peeta. Brunette Peeta…come now Tee, come to the dark side…weakening in your convictions I feel you.

      • I like him. Really. But making him brunette doesn’t change the fact that he’s too delicate for me. Come on. You know my hubs (the one who recently bawled at Despicable Me AND at Little Women). I like ’em manly. Ahem.

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